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Blog

Where my mind wanders, rests, and flows

 

Filtering by Category: balance

It's Not Luck, It's Hard Work

Laarni San Juan

Yes, good things do happen with patience and a LOT of hard work. 

It’s not luck, it’s putting in the hard work and being READY when life knocks at your door. 

Access to Warriors season tickets are a bucket list item for me and a dream come true. I put my name on the waiting list three years ago and boom, the day has come! I am ready!

I come from humble beginnings, like real humble. So humble that my father wasn’t educated past the 2nd grade, I qualified for free lunches in public school, I hardly had toys, and I struggled with being bullied because I was the frail kid with thick glasses and bony legs whose elementary school photos looked like I’m about to cry or pee in my pants (which I probably did). I was always the last one picked for the kickball team. Always.

Life hasn’t been easy BUT one thing that made the positive difference was that I was often surrounded by CARING parents and adults in a SAFE environment. I never felt that I was alone or neglected. My mom is really the hero in all this: she took on the US in the 60s as an immigrant (I cannot imagine leaving a country for another country and not turning back), she drove, bought a modest home, had a stable job and somehow figured out the formula for being a strong caretaker to me, my brother, and everybody else. Today, she is 84 and is a whiz at facebook, slot machines, and owns more Ugg boots than I do.

In high school I got exposed to skiing, 49er games, and college options outside of the local community college (stuff that my parents are not familiar with). These were “American” activities. What I experienced was a true perspective changer during those formative years. In college I got exposed to positive mentors who showed me what seeking higher aspirations does to one’s life. I will always be grateful to Dr. Ruth Hill, Dr. Melen McBride, my close circle of buddies, and a bunch of people who rock.

After college, I discovered therapy (the BEST HIDDEN GEM ever) and have never denied my need to run to that space until this day.  I've had to unload a bunch of crap and memories to allow me to flourish into the life I have today. If you have access to EAP services at your job or school, go. It’s a secret world that no one has to know about [hashtag lifesaver].

I’m living example of what could happen with hard work, support, and trusting the journey ahead.  If you work hard, your battle is 50% done. If you don’t have support, get it. If you have a hard time trusting, find ways to gain it back.

A Balanced Life is Like Flipping Burgers

Laarni San Juan

Balanced Life Flipping Burgers Sweet and Focused Life

Imagine you are at your friend's annual BBQ. Guests slowly trickle in and the host suddenly remembers somebody has to be in charge of the burger bar. There's laughter in the backyard, a bunch of head nods, no one bites, and finally the host points at you to take it on. You oblige. You think, how hard could it be to throw patties on the grill and get cheese ready for the cheeseburger fans. The party starts to warm up, beer is being chugged, the wine bottles are getting poured and the crowd looking comfortable. Your first order comes in, "well done please". Sure. No problem. Patty one thrown onto the hot grill. Second order, "medium with a touch of rare". Okay, I know what that looks like.  Cool. Third order, "medium with crispy edges but not burned". That sounds easy. That's how I like my burgers too. The patties are cooking, guests come over to the burger stand and you get distracted. You start laughing and cracking jokes too. You lose track of what's cooking. Uh oh. Burger one is almost burned (it's more like charred).  You forget what order three wanted so you keep it cooking. Starts to feel chaotic and you start to feel bad because you may have screwed up the one simple thing that was asked of you. It was supposed be easy but you managed to lose sight and now the person who depended on you goes hungry and maybe even disappointed. You pray they will say it's okay and we all move on. 

That scenario reminds me of life.  We have so much to cook all at once: health, family, job, community, business, and you can even throw in keeping up with social media. A lot of moving parts all at once. Whatever you got going on in your life, it's important to keep an eye on what's "cooking". We have to periodically check on the patties, flip it over once in awhile,  and sometimes chuck it out because we decided to have a veggie one instead. Maybe throw it on a toasted wheat bun with some hot sauce for zest. Maybe the fire underneath loses its heat and the time is taking way longer than planned.  Time to get more charcoal and lighter fluid to keep the fire going or is it? Whatever the situation, keep an eye on what's on the grill at all times.

You are the cook of your life. What's on your menu?