If you are not doing what you say you want, you are lying to yourself. Lies start to erode the soul and soon enough, you can’t even trust your own self. Yikes.
Where my mind wanders, rests, and flows
You either jump on opportunities or sit another year and let time pass by. Which is it? We live in a generation where our attention spans are wayyyyy shorter. Less attention means increased chances to lose sight of important stuff such as our future, our tomorrows. It’s a choice to pay attention and actually put teeth to the grind. You choose.
Show up everyday. Pay attention to what really matters to you and ditch the rest. Time reveals the contents of the box.
I’ve been there. I hit rock bottom mentally and emotionally when the ship I trusted started to steer and sail funny. Something was off but I still sailed this baby on the waters: I helped everyone on board this vessel. I took great pride being an enabler (I didn’t know any better, ok?) I was there when problems needed fixing way past the midnight hour. At the time, it wasn’t a big deal. Why? Because I was raised to care and nurture those who needed it or help systems that were failing. I didn’t complain and the job needed to get done. That’s how my mind worked the first 45 years of my life. In hindsight, I realize one major life lesson: while I was helping and enabling, my own spirit was actually drowning and it was harder and harder for me to replenish what I was giving away. That’s what I mean by hitting rock bottom mentally and emotionally (add in physically too). My own ship had a slow leak and I had no idea where the malfunction was happening. I just kept going though. I had great experiences along the way while ignoring the leak. Eventually, however, the main deck of my own ship needed new flooring, the hole (wherever it was) seriously needed to be fixed and the ship basically needed an overhaul. I want to keep sailing. I want to navigate the world. In order to do that, maintenance and fixing needed to happen. I docked myself, got quiet, and got deep. I constantly asked myself what was I doing and what was my purpose? Why was I forcing myself to be in situations that really wasn’t filling my new level of consciousness? I waffled back and forth about moving on because that meant I would need to know where I’m going. It’s been five years since that green light came on. It blinks yellow every so often but I’m so glad I took the time to fix my vessel because this ship continues to sail and it’s going even further than it’s ever gone.
Your character is your destiny.
Life can get funky and not feel fair. Just reshuffle the deck and play the hands dealt. The odds of winning are in your favor when you go all in. At some point you win back what you put in. Hint: double down on yourself and it's a sweet life.
Ever since the awful incident of being called a derogatory name and a system turning their back when I asked for help, I soon learned the painful (or more like shameful) truth about how things work in life. Yes, that unexpected crap happened but in hindsight, it happened for a reason. One, it was a reality check but most importantly, it pushed me to constructively deal with the frustration and anger that was building up in me. I instinctively knew I HAD to deal with it head on because I couldn't possibly live a life 24/7 of toxic thinking especially over crap that's out of my control. The past six years has been an intense period of discovery, learning, and introspection. I've learned that being quiet and listening to my thoughts pry open the journey to a whole different layer of evolution. The seeds of abundance grow like weeds soon after.
I loved that game when I was a child. I was happy on the schoolyard following the leader especially if the leader was confident and knew how to play fairly. The leader who was also kind (the opposite of a bully) also made the experience so fun and made me want to play more. I never wanted that school bell to ring to signify recess was over. Some things haven't changed. I love and follow leaders who know their sh**, who play fair, and find ways to make it enjoyable even when the game can feel tough and unpleasant.
Ever work on a project and you feel like giving up? Me too. Ever question if all the work is worth it? Me too. It IS worth every ounce of tears, fears, and worry if you want the outcome bad enough. I have put the green light on dreams and yes, it IS worth sticking to the plan and getting to the destination. Just think of the postage stamp the next time you feel like giving up.
Travel shifts your energy and releases your story. Visiting unfamiliar places and meeting new faces unleash your spirit that's meant to be free.